Didn't expect to get into this situation

 

I am 30 years old and I have been in a relationship with a young man for only 2 months. We live together for a month. I recently found out that I was pregnant. The cycle is not stable and for 10 weeks already. I don't know what to do. I am in another country, I do not work. I'm not sure how I feel about him either. He is also shocked by this news. He is absolutely not ready for children, although in his plans he wants children, but not now, too early for our relationship, they have just begun. I am going crazy from thoughts, from not understanding how to live on, what to do. I'm thinking about having an abortion, but I don't think I can. Very scary and big risks. I don’t know how it happened. Protected. And what is the punishment for me? I myself will not pull the child. If I leave for Russia, at least there is housing and a mother there. But how will I work, how will I support my family! I never thought that I would ever find myself in such a desperate situation.